Bottom/Apocalypse

Apocalypse
Season 1, Episode 4
Airdate	October 7, 1991
Production Number	104
Written by	Rik Mayall, Adrian Edmondson
Directed by	Ed Bye
← 1x03 Contest	1x05 → 's Up
Bottom — Season One

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Apocalypse is the fourth episode of the first season of Bottom.

Starring:

Guest Starring:

Plot Overview

Eddie and Richie are looking at their pet fish and deciding whether it's dead or not, as if it is when Richie's rich Aunt Olga arrives they can serve it as the only food in the house to garner sympathy. Richie calls Aunt Olga and gets one of her neighbours who breaks the news that she's dead, and has left him £600 - which they take to a funfair.

As Eddie shoots everything in sight at a stall, Richie loudly brags about the £600, and by the time Eddie's ran out of bullets his wallet's been taken. He accuses the gypsies of swiping it, which doesn't go down too well, so they fall back on Eddie's escape plan of shooting the stall owner in the eye with his own pellet gun. During their escape, they end up in a tent with a fortune teller, who tells Richie that within 3 days he'll be dead.

A disastrous trip to the hospital later, Richie realises his death's more likely to come from an accident than from something diagnosable, and ends up hiding under the sofa once they get back to the flat, Eddie taking the opportunity to spend the whole time getting drunk and eating fried food.

Noticing the ceiling is sagging above his hideout, Richie questions Eddie and learns Eddie keeps a piano in the middle of his room. He sends Eddie off to move it and prays - Eddie starts playing it partway through and eventually him and the piano fall right through the ceiling, landing on where Richie would have been if he hadn't been shouting at Eddie to come down.

"It's you!" he exclaims, accusing Eddie of conspiring to kill him then beating him with a poker, knocking him out of the flat and down the stairs. Later on, as Richie tries to sleep, a tall cloaked figure with a scythe knocks on his door. Richie pleads for his life for a while, then tries to "Be English about this", threatening to call the police if Death doesn't leave his house; Death throws the phone out of the window. Increasingly scared, he asks whether he's going "up or down"; Death motions Down and while Richie cries in fear, Death staggers around, his hood falling down for a moment to reveal it's Eddie on stilts.

Some negotiations later, Richie agrees to give "Death" the remaining £300 he inherited - on reciept "Death" makes a run for it, resulting in Eddie falling off his stilts and down the stairs. In the end, the £300 ends up in the hands of the stall owner Eddie shot in the eye as medical bills.

Quotes

Fortune Teller: Cross my palm with silver!

Richie: Look, I can't cross your palm with silver - i've just had my wallet nicked, you're a fortune teller you should know that!

Richie: So this is it, is it? I hurt my leg in the Falklands conflict for this?

Old Man: Did he?

Eddie: Yeah, he tripped over the coffee table trying to change channels.

Richie: Here we are... War and Peace. Been at it a few years now, haven't we old mate? Where was I... ah yes, Chapter 1 Sentence 3... ...here we go again, where's the dictionary?

Richie: How do you know these things?

Eddie: I'm death!

Richie: Sorry, HOW DO YOU KNOW THESE THINGS???