The IT Crowd (UK)/Return of the Golden Child

Return of the Golden Child
Season 2, Episode 2
Airdate	August 31, 2007
Written by	Graham Linehan
Directed by	Graham Linehan
← 2x01 The Work Outing	2x03 → Moss and the German
The IT Crowd (UK) — Season Two

This article about an episode needs to be expanded with more information. Please help out by editing it.

Return of the Golden Child is the second episode of the second season of The IT Crowd, and the eighth episode overall.

Starring: Chris O'Dowd (Roy), Richard Ayoade (Moss), Katherine Parkinson (Jen)

Guest Starring: Matt Berry (Douglas), Silas Carson (Derek), Noel Fielding (Richmond), Alex MacQueen (Vicar), Chris Morris (Denholm), Belinda Stewart-Wilson (Barbara), Charlotte Weston (Stephanie)

Plot Overview

Denholm is holding a meeting about the current financial status of Reynholm Industries, which is doing brilliantly. Just after he declares himself the greatest man in the world his secretary enters the meeting to inform him that there are some policemen looking to talk to him. Denholm asks her to make them some tea as he stands up. He walks calmly over to the window, opens it and steps out, falling several dozen floors.

Earlier that Day...

Roy is bragging about his new mobile phone to Moss and Jen. He lists an impressive amount of features, but then notes that he is not happy with the weak vibration setting. Moss tells him that he can fix that, so Roy gives him the phone. Moss then makes Roy finish off an online questionnaire he's been doing with questions relating to Roy's health. Once Moss finishes it he tells Roy that the website will calculate the exact date of his death, a piece of information he had not yet given to Roy. Roy is upset to find out what the questionnaire was for, insisting that he knew about those websites already and didn't want to know when he would die. He tells Moss not to look, but he does so anyway. Once Roy realises that Moss knows he demands to be told. Moss is reluctant and Roy suspects that the website says he should already be dead. Moss tells him that is not the case and he in fact won't die until Thursday.

Jen enters and says she needs someone for a job upstairs. Roy isn't taking the news of his impending death well so she sends Moss. Moss finds the problem with the computers, noticing that someone has turned off the firewall on it. He gives the staff in his immediate vicinity a lecture on the importance of firewalls and anti-viral software when suddenly Denholm falls past the window behind him.

Back downstairs Roy is talking to his mother on the phone trying to find out what age his relatives have died at. Moss enters the office, upset about the computer issue he just had to deal with and that he had to walk back down because the lifts were broken. Jen then walks out of her office and tells everyone that Denholm has died.

Roy, Moss and Jen are in the office on Thursday morning getting ready for Denholm's funeral. Roy doesn't want to go because of the online questionnaire. Moss tries to get Jen to work out her date of death, but she refuses. She believes she's got a good few years left, after she quit smoking. She tells Moss that she quit through sheer willpower and would now, "rather lick a tramp." She unfortunately says this as their new boss, Derek, walks into the office. He wants to speak to her in her office. Moss gives Roy his phone back and he tries out the new vibration setting, which is incredibly violent. Roy is then shocked to find that that is the new lowest setting.

In Jen's office Derek tells her of his well-known distaste for the IT department and how they are now on their last chance. This is news to Jen and she begs for another chance. As she pleads to Derek for more than one more chance they hear noises from outside the office, where Roy and Moss are playing with Roy's phone. The pair are giggling like children while holding the violently vibrating phone. Derek is shocked by their behaviour on the day of Denholm's funeral and storms out of the office. Jen discovers that Roy and Moss already knew about Derek's dislike of their department. As they're preparing to leave for the funeral Richmond walks out of his room with his face painted like a skull. Jen tells him that he is not going to the funeral, but Richmond doesn't know about it.