King of the Hill/Hank's Choice
Hank's Choice is the sixteenth episode of the fifth season of King of the Hill, and the one hundredth episode overall.
When Bobby develops allergies to Ladybird's dander, Hank avoids having to get rid of her and comes up with a solution after building a doghouse.
Dale: We all came to see the opening of a doghouse.
Seen, But Not Heard
- Bon Jovi - "Thank You for Loving Me"
- Bobby has allergies to dog dander, but takes medication to combat it.
Behind the Scenes
Allusions and References
- After Hank comes up the idea of building a doghouse, we see him measure Ladybird and begins building, ending on an image of the doghouse, only to pan out and reveal he's just built the model.
- We hear Luanne giggling when she breaks the champagne, but her mouth is closed.
- Peggy: You know, it frightens me to think that we raised Bobby for 12 years without the Internet. Parents without the internet should have their children taken away.
- Peggy: Well, I am searching the Web as fast as I can. Apparently, there is a local rock band named Cedar Fever and it's complicating my research.
- Doctor: Bobby's allergic to the dog.
- Hank: Well, you said dander. How do you know that Peggy doesn't have the dander? Well, you're in that school with kids from all over. She got lice once.
- Peggy: Hank, the test was specifically for dog dander. And you once came home from Mexico with a butt worm!
- Doctor: You could try bathing Ladybird three times a week, then vacuuming her.
- Hank: Well, I already do that.
- Peggy: Look, if you want a dog inside, it says right here that there are several hypoallergenic breeds of dog, such as poodles or hairless.
- Hank: A poodle? Why not go all the way and just get me a cat and a sex change operation? Can't we just give Bobby something?
- Doctor: You could give him daily shots, but Bobby - well, we had enough trouble with the pinpricks. There are pills, but they don't often work and their side effects include drowsiness, hives, and rectal bleeding. And most people find it much simpler just to get rid of the dog.
- Hank: We'll try the pills.
- Bill: You know, Hank, I could take in Ladybird. She sniffed me once and did not look displeased.
- Hank: Now, if you have any suggestions for improvements make them now before I file the permits.
- Dale: It looks too small.
- Hank: It's a model, Dale.
- Dale: In that case, it's just right.
- Peggy: The floor is warm.
- Hank: That's the radiant subfloor heating. You know, 80% of a dog's heat loss is through its pads. Okay, that figure came from the radiant-floor people, so it may be a little high.
- Bill: Hank, I can give her a good home.
- Dale: Ladybird won't go in her doghouse and her doghouse is already better than your house.
- Bobby: I'll take it!
- Peggy: Bobby, honey, I do not know what your father told you, but he has to love you whether you move in or not.
- Bobby: Mom, this is a perfect starter home. I like the neighbourhood, I won't have to change schools, and it's Connie-adjacent.
- Hank: Bobby's a big boy, Peggy. Can't hang on forever.
- Bobby: Time to move on, mom.
- Connie: I stole a bottle of Chianti from my dad. I poured out the wine so we can put a candle in it.
- Minh: Hey, Peggy Hill! Connie want to have your Bobby over to play. You had him fixed, right?
- Peggy: Well, I'm glad you find my son's sickness so amusing. If he were living in a plastic bubble, I would be having lunch with Elton John. But because he is in a doghouse - big laugh! Well, you know what'd be really funny?You know what'd be really funny? Huh?! If Connie broke her leg!
- Hank: We got some of your mail here.
- Bobby: Suddenly everybody wants to sell Bobby Hill a security system.
- Hank: So, uh, your mother was wanting to see you. How does dinner on Thursday sound?
- Bobby: Thursday's poker night. The stripper comes over at 9:00. I'm just yankin' your chain! She's over at 8:00.
- Dale: Okay, now, everyone get into single file for dessert.
- (no one moves)
- Dale: (cocks rifle) Single file.
- Hank: You'll have to walk her when it's time to go. She won't go in her own yard.
- Bill: I'm the same way.
- Hank: All right, get yourself washed up. We don't eat with dirty fingernails.
- Bobby: You go ahead without me. I'm just gonna order a pizza.
- Hank: We're having chicken and broccoli.
- Bobby: Okay. You can have some of my pizza if you want.
- Hank: The only pizza you'll be having is chicken and broccoli pizza without the crust and the pizza sauce. But plenty of cheese, because that's the way your mother makes it.
- Bobby: Has Ladybird been in the house?
- Peggy: Hank?
- Hank: No. Well, Bill brought her by the alley. She gave me her paw, but - What am I supposed to do? Leave her hanging? That would have been rude. Rude.
- Connie: (to Bobby) You used to have the best-looking doghouse in the neighbourhood. Now I bet it isn't even in the top ten!
- Boomhauer: You want a beer, man?
- Hank: I don't wanna associate beer with this kind of pain.